First She Said Some Hurtful Things...

...And then she pushed me down the stairs.

This is quote from a comic routine that my stepdad likes to quote. It's funny when he says it, but it wasn't funny when it happened today at our house.

Mazie had used some of Vivian's stickers that went to her December calendar. Mazie applied them to their desktop. Vivian felt upset and angry when she found out. I heard a fray developing - no injuries, and then Vivian started down the stairs exactly as she should if they can't work it out on their own.

Well, Mazie was in hot pursuit and shoved Vivian down the last two steps. Vivian rolled right into the boom box and landed funny on her left foot.

Now, what would you do? I really want to know because I am a little lost. I was so mad at Mazie I knew I couldn't do anything yet besides sweep her up and put her in solitary confinement, which I did. Then I returned downstairs to check out Vivian, who was totally fine despite her awkward landing.

Here's what I thought: People can get seriously injured - even killed - by being pushed down steps. Heck, Mazie herself had an ER visit after rolling down half a flight of stairs. Mazie absolutely has to know that this is one of the most dire offenses ever. But, she's never done it before. She's only pushed Vivian a few times that I know of, and I'm pretty sure she doesn't beat up on anyone else. So she may have been unaware of the effect her pushing on the stairs would have.

Mazie had just told me that her favorite Christmas gift had been the Barbie (whose influence we have fastidiously kept out of our house until now) that Aunt Melinda gave her. Plus, she was anticipating a big dessert of leftover Christmas candy. So I went upstairs and explained to Mazie how dangerous a push down the stairs could be, that she may NEVER EVER do that and that to remind her, she was going to lose Barbie for a while and dessert for tonight.

Surprisingly, it was the dessert part that really smarted. She forgot about Barbie in short order but when dinner time rolled around, Mazie asked about dessert with big cow eyes and a soft voice. "What are we having for dessert tonight?" "Mazie, you lost your dessert privilege when you pushed Vivian down the stairs." Commence sobbing. She sobbed through most of dinner. We made her leave the table because she was interfering with conversation and digestion, so she wailed on the couch.

Finally, the fuss was over. I guess we'll watch to see if she pushes somebody else down the stairs. I'm lost on this one. But we're discussing stair etiquette again tomorrow. It'll be an in-service that nobody can get out of.